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Old 08-29-2009, 07:07 PM   #61
Thekylekurtz
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Ooh ooh who wants to learn what a terrible experience that is saving a life can be like?
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kyle is having anime moments with LT.
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Old 08-30-2009, 10:07 AM   #62
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Bit late, eh? But I wrote this for today's story and decided I might as well enter this into here, too.

--------------------

I wrote this as a guide for myself so I would still have something to write about when I lack inspiration. Feel free to use it yourself, though!

It is often said that starting is the hardest part of any endeavor. Whether or not this is true, there is no doubt that it can sometimes be troublesome and that writing is no exception!

First you must grab yourself a character. This is, by far, the most important part of any story.

Select three things about your character:
A) Profession
B) Looks
C) Piece of background information.

To make the character interesting, make sure at least two of these things contradict. For instance, they might be a ballerina who is very pretty...who once stopped a war!

Or maybe a hobo who lost all his money gambling and drinking...who wears only the finest clothes!

There are so many possibilities!

Next, thrust the character into a situation. Decide three things about the situation:
A) Where is it?
B) How is the character involved
C) How did the situation start?

Once again, make sure at least two contradict. It could be in a bar where the character is in a drunken brawl...because someone complimented the character!

Or it could be in a secret underground facility because the character was called there...and the character is currently having tea with Elvis!

Finally is the background. But wait, the background is already there! How can there be more? Simple. Tie the two backgrounds together. Ask yourself “How could these be related?” with a third piece of background information.

So now we have a pretty ballerina that once stopped a war and is currently in a bar having a drunken brawl because someone complimented her. How do once stopped a war and someone complimented her tie together? The war holds bad memories for her and she was flung into a blind fury when someone mentioned the war through a compliment!

We also have a hobo wearing fine clothes that lost all his money gambling and drinking who is in an underground facility having tea with Elvis because he was called there. How does lost all his money gambling/drinking and was called there fit together? One of the things he gambled away was his free will to this secret underground origination!

Finally, as an optional step, you can create multiple characters using these methods and then tie them together using anything you want. Maybe they were tied before the story began? Or possibly they won't meet until later.

After the fight, the ballerina could have been thrown in jail. After tea with Elvis, the hobo could of escaped! The hobo makes his way around town, but the organization finds him again! Until they call up transport to get him back to the facility, they use their ties with the police to have him thrown into a normal jail cell...that's right next to the ballerina! At this point, who knows where it could go? Only you, the writer, do!

And that's how you find something to write about when you have no inspiration.
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Old 08-30-2009, 12:26 PM   #63
Auntie Grieves
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Default Writer's Contest 7: Forumite hate mail

All right, this contest is gonna be for how much hate you can cram in a post. Target should be some frequenting forumite, be it Ethan, Ves, me, Siz, etc. Go nuts, I don't care. Contest ends a week after the first entry.
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Old 08-30-2009, 12:28 PM   #64
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Contest ends a week after the first entry, blahblahblah
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Old 08-30-2009, 12:53 PM   #65
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But I love you all. D:
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Old 08-30-2009, 05:03 PM   #66
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But I love you all. D:
Jarate.
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Old 08-30-2009, 08:22 PM   #67
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The real question is if I hate anyone on this forum enough to merit more than one sentence.
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Old 08-30-2009, 09:12 PM   #68
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Alright, here goes.



mehfag
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gonna start a corpse party all up in this bitch
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Old 08-31-2009, 12:54 PM   #69
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Hope you enjoy reading as much as I did writing.

Dear Ace Scope,

You said you loved me. You said that while we snuggled late at night watching another episode of Queer Eye for a Straight Guy. You said you loved me. You said that while we watched The Devil Wears Prada in the movie theatre. You said you…loved me.

Lies. They've always been lies. You've toyed me with like how I toyed with you every Wednesday night. Like how a little girl it with Barbie dolls. You pulled my strings, pushed my buttons, until I thought that one day you and I would stand before several witnesses, a priest, and all our enemies, and you would look to me and slide that ring on. The same ring your father gave to you for your love. We would've shared our vows…then kissed. All of those beautiful dreams shattered like a piece of glass. The pieces so broken so scattered…it would be impossible to put them all back together.

You may say to me 'I don't understand', well I bet this JILL does! Yeah! I saw you! You thought I was asleep. You thought I wouldn't know! BUT I KNOW YOU CUNT GOBBLER! I KNOW! You've talking behind my back to that whore! That fucking whore! How many times have you done it, huh? HOW MANY TIMES?! I thought you loved me! But I'm just some goddamn boy toy, aren't I? I loved you! I loved you for so long! But you make it all some bad soap opera! I hate you! I HATE YOU! I hope you get her teen pregnant, get AIDS, eat shit AND DIE! YEAH! I HOPE YOU FUCKING DIE! EAT SHIT! THEN DIE!

With Broken Love,

Blazen

P.S. FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 08-31-2009, 08:55 PM   #70
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Could've used a lot more gay innuendo, but I like it.
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Old 09-03-2009, 04:49 PM   #71
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I just can't do it, okay? I just can't spew out hate like expected. So instead I'm going to deliver some like.

Against the rules? Sure. Cliché'? Maybe. Bullshit compliments that I don't mean? Never. Every word I put down is true, or I wouldn't write it.

If I didn't include you in this list, it's probably because I don't know you well enough. PS: These are in no particular order.

Ace Scope: I would consider you my best friend on these forums. We have great conversations and you're generally a positive guy. Also, you have far more adventures in life than I.

Nuva: Second best friend, hands down. The (probably) only reason you're behind Ace is because we don't have as many conversations. Oh, and I think your job is interesting. (I love to travel and things related to it.)

Ethan: You're a really happy person most of the time. I am extremely joyful when you are extremely joyful; you just have that kind of effect. So buck up, Jarate man, you'll get back your jar!

Mayu: I could say your adventure games are great, but that's like saying that you breath; Everyone knows it and it's not very personal. Instead I want to say that you have some of the most truthful insights to the world I have ever had the pleasure of hearing. You are also very cultured.

KyleKurtz: Where do I even start? First, you put your life on the line for America. That takes balls and I respect you for it. Secondly, you have a very laid back attitude. It's very refreshing compared to most people's high strung ones, including my own.

Addy: You radiate a sort of aura. Yes, that sounds really weird, but hear me out. Your general presence in a conversation tends to have a positive effect on those around you that lifts up spirits. Keep it up!

Radd: You know more than you think you know. I have learned a lot speaking to you and feel I am a better person for it. Thank you.

Devilman: You are mature for your age when you want to be. With a little work, I can see you being a very important person in the world. Your doodles aren't half bad, either, and sometimes make an otherwise bland day enjoyable.

Nami: On the occasions when you're nice, I feel as if you hold nothing back. Most people are plagued with an inability to show their positive emotions fully; I think that you don't have that.

Veserius: You are grounded hard in your beliefs, but for good reason. In fact, most of what you do and say is for good reason. I don't think that your average person can truthfully claim that.

And I'm sure there are others whom I forgot, but oh well. I probably didn't know them well enough.

Uhhh...I just realized something. In a way, this entire post was one big “Fuck you!” But to who? And how?

To Grieves. Screw him and his shitty writing contest.
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Old 09-03-2009, 04:57 PM   #72
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o_o
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Old 09-03-2009, 05:16 PM   #73
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Quote:
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Most people are plagued with an inability to show their positive emotions fully
The fuck kind of maladjusted rejects were you raised around?
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Old 09-03-2009, 05:18 PM   #74
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X3
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Old 09-03-2009, 05:27 PM   #75
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Quote:
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The fuck kind of maladjusted rejects were you raised around?
I have no clue. Maybe it's a problem with me. I have a tendency to view farther into people's motives than I should.
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Old 09-03-2009, 07:33 PM   #76
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Vaber loses preemptively because he's a fag.
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Old 09-03-2009, 07:43 PM   #77
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Dear forum,

Jesus Christ you guys, what the crap? I know the internet can be the home to some pretty retarded shit but seriously some of the stuff you guys say is just amazing. Maybe some people are worse! Dear God, I know it's true... but please spare me from them... I've had enough already just from the people of this goddamn fucking forum.
I mean first of all, do you know just how retarded you sound when you start talking about yourselves? It's like a perfectly good record is playing and then somebody HITS IT WITH A MALLET. Suddenly you're talking about your feelings and pushing some half-ass philosophy that I can tell you just made up and are just doing this to sound deep, introspective, some bullshit like that. Listen to me, you're not. There have been a lot of intelligent people who have thought a lot about life and shit and just because you're a happy person or you're a sad person doesn't make you an expert on the meaning of life.
And NO, I'm not going to do YOUR masturbation FOR YOU. You can go ahead and masturbate to yourself about how introspective and deep and right and whatever whenever you want in the privacy of your own home. Stop posting about it and waiting for other people to jerk you off for you! Christ.
And the posts you make! Some of you... just... look... if you don't have anything to say... don't fucking post anyway. I mean, okay, maybe you want the pump depot to move along or something but, I guarantee you, the depository isn't going to erupt into activity because you made a post that says "shoobidi scoobidi whosit"
And you all keep expecting some sort of recognition from everyone. That's the only reason I can think of for the fact that you keep trying so hard to say these very dumb things. You must honestly think someone is going to read that and say good job! I bet some of you piss yourselves with excitement everytime someone replies under your post with a "lol".

Look you guys, you can be alright sometimes! Some of you are great, even. But this is a forum, not a soapbox. We have livejournals for shit like that. Nobody will read it but you know what? Nobody will read it on the forum either! Except it'll still BE THERE in the forum like a turd you just left behind you.

So please. Stop shitting on the forum. Shit in your home. Thank you.
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Old 09-03-2009, 07:59 PM   #78
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aw man. this is gonna be tough.
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Old 09-03-2009, 08:15 PM   #79
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That Frood:

Seriously, a dancing cupcake avatar? What are you, gay? Cupcakes are for two people: douchebag hipsters and fat people. God, I can imagine you snarfing down bags of Cheetoes with one hand, and hitting the refresh key with the other hand. Actually, your other hand is shoveling the cupcakes baking under your rolls of fat into your presumably chin bearded mouth. But that would mean you bake cupcakes, which are for douche bag hipsters.
I bet you also post from the middle of a Starbucks on your fucking MacBook smirking to everyone as if to say "Heh, look at me guys, I'm sooooo posting on a webcomic forum!" as you type shit about how upset you are that Guitar Hero made Modest Mouse not indie and how your "skinny" (in quotations because we all know you're so fat you bleed cholesterol) jeans are chafing your necrotized thighs.
Then you sip your frappachino half-caf (It's either decaf or regular, make a decision pussy) with soymilk (Note: Soy has photoestrogens, which produce estrogen, which is what makes you a bitch, bitch) as you hit the enter key, after which you lay back in your chair and dream of how your liberal arts degree will make you a non-profit CEO/artist.
I mention Liberal Arts because you're too stupid for anything that requires work.
Go home and cry to some Vampire Weekend you cocksucking, semen chugging, cupcake eating mountainous blob of fail.

-DoGooderer

P.S. Your Mom gives lousy head. I guess failure must run in your family.

Last edited by DoGooderer; 09-03-2009 at 08:18 PM.
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Old 09-03-2009, 08:22 PM   #80
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The second paragraph made me smile a little.
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Old 09-06-2009, 09:17 PM   #81
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The second paragraph made me smile a little.
Yeah, an IRONIC smile.
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Old 09-06-2009, 10:24 PM   #82
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Is this where I talk about how deep I am?
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Old 09-07-2009, 03:08 AM   #83
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Dear Veserius,

I hate your stinking guts. You make me vomit. You're scum between my toes!

Love, Kaze
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Old 09-07-2009, 08:47 AM   #84
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Dear Kaze,

You are a passive aggressive shithead who says nice things to my face all the while cursing my name. You saw this contest as a way to say something half cutesy about me, but you really mean what you just said. "D'awwwwww Ves, I hate you so much XD" HOW FUCKING CUTE

You motherfucking sycophantic, weeaboo, whiny, cowardly faggot. You know whats worse? For the longest time I was willing to overlook your shit because you are friends with someone I am friends with. I gave myself a legitimate chance to like you, even you are the sort of person I loathe. See the thing is that I took you acting outwardly nice to me at face value, like an idiot, and didn't really how much of a coward you were.

Once Nami gave you the greenlight to act out all the things you'd been thinking you just kinda rolled with it. You got to bandwagon on to the bullshit she subjects me to, all the while feeling justified. Are you that fucking terrified to have an opinion all of your own when someone else isn't going to protect you? On the subject of having someone to protect you, isn't it a little odd how over the what 2 years I've known you that you cling to people in positions of power? Sarge and Gabby on VGC. Dia, Nami, and Gabby here. I don't think I've ever seen you attempt to have a meaningful conversation with anyone else, but I constantly see you putting your head out for pets like some sort of fucking dog. WHO IS A GOOD BOY? FETCH THE STICK CHARLIE!

And you know what is fucking hilarious? You are so caught up in this shit you can't even see these people for what they are. You sucked up to Gabby for years, unaware of how shitty the person you were interacting with was. It literally took Nami TELLING YOU that you weren't supposed to like Gabby for you to realize something was off, and this is after meeting Gabby in person.

So Kaze, you've managed to not be your own person in a medium that lets everyone be the individual they want to be. Congrats on being such a faggot.

Hating you with all of my heart,
Ves

PS




How was the sex with Gabby? Did you guys do a 2 way pocky urethral dildo? How kawaii ^_______^;;

Last edited by Ves; 09-07-2009 at 08:51 AM.
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Old 09-07-2009, 08:54 AM   #85
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Oh man, Ves, you made me think of that cartoon with the dog constantly fetching the stick. I can't get it out of my head now. That dog went insane.
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Old 09-07-2009, 08:55 AM   #86
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I really could have done without that screenshot.
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Old 09-07-2009, 09:07 AM   #87
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Pffhaha I remember that.
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Old 09-07-2009, 09:22 AM   #88
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Damn, I didn't know a quote from the Little Rascals could get a response like that.
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Old 09-07-2009, 09:24 AM   #89
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Quote:
(12:46:01 PM) inthesto: I like the way Kaze wrote it so he can easily pull the "just playin dawg" card if you decide to shit on him
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Old 09-07-2009, 09:25 AM   #90
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Kaze, you're a passive aggressive douchebag.

We both know it. The rest of the forum knows it.

Stop trying to act cutesy motherfucker.
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